WHY STRUGGLE MATTERS

May 16, 2023

It is like having training wheels on a bike for life. Most parents teach their children to learn how to ride a bike with training wheels. At some point, we take the training wheels off to see if they can learn to ride without them. It’s very shaky at first, but with practice, effort, and focus they can learn to master riding a bike without training wheels. Not allowing your child to struggle is like keeping their training wheels on for life. They will never be able to master most things as an adult, because they won’t understand how to tolerate and work through struggle.

Having training wheels can also be seen like being wrapped in bubble wrap. Your child never has a way of learning how to pick themselves up when they fall. They’re wrapped in a cushion that allows them to never feel any pain, and the training wheels truly allow them to comfortably
coast on a bike and never learn to balance, anticipate, or work hard. These are all easily translatable in what is necessary for a child to become an adult.

If you constantly rushing in to help them, they will never learn what it means to struggle. Struggling matters to develop your child into becoming an independent person. Struggling matters to build resilience, tolerance, adaptability, and emotion regulation. Without struggle,
you are subconsciously telling your child you don’t trust them to work through failure. Youundermine their growth, and without struggle they will not know what it ever means to thrive.

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